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John "Zeus" Kerry
You can't win a damn war America!!! As long as I exist you're not even going to live on a Moon dollar! rise up Martians we have a big job to do we're going to take America to ensure them that they cannot win against us show them they're powerless -'John Kerry addressing the Martians to invade Earth' "God damn the United States I'm done with it all!"-'John Kerry' "You are a complete waste of time and money!"-'John Kerry' "If you want SOMETHING take it!"-'Kerrheanese Proverb' John Kerry, John Bill Balls of Earth, Senior John Kerry, a criminal mastermind who is the de facto dictator of planet Kerrhea and the United States in some timelines. His rival is Republican Commander Chief. He was most controversial because he visited the nations who hated us and the rights we have. Kerry wanted us to know that he was powerful and where we are not worthy he is. Early Years Kerry burned the medals he received during the American-Kerrhea wars in a fit of misogynistic rage when he found out his wife left him after the war. He was found running naked down the street yelling "AGGHHHHHHH!!!!!" and when Christmas came he was the one who wanted to ban it. John was accused of being a Moonite sympathizer. Diplomatic Relations Johnny hasn't been successful in making allies in the past year due to his anti-Earth stance during a failed coup in the Senate. His budget for the Kerrheanese Empire has run out and seeking asylum in America isn't happening after he insulted the President of the United States. His visits to Asscrackistan has been canceled due to a war with the Ultrabastard Brothers. Domestic Policy His constant surveillance of his people and officials has been questioned by the Kerrheanese Senate. He's known to dress up as Zeus has been somewhat disturbing to his people. Kerry only cares about the immortality through the New Age cults and the writing of the Prophet of Earth. Foreign Policy Kerry allowed Russia to take over Crimeapolis and North Korea have nuclear weapons. He failed to recognize the authority of American trade outside of Earth. His anti-Earth embargo has been underway because of America's alliance with SerSo Ink Inc. a multimillion-dollar corporate office printer company. His home planet of Kerrhea is his main priority and he doesn't care about American politics the same way that some of us do. However, we tried to take over the United States Senate unsuccessfully installing a puppet government in foreign countries. John Kerry was awarded the Dumbass Award for his dumbass policies both foreign and domestic. Meanwhile, he was dealing with countries that were opposing the United States and also other tariffs on imported goods. Eventually, this led to a big trade war between China and the United States and John Kerry was nowhere to be found except in a bathroom cowering in fear that he's going to be found out. The Prussian Investigation John Kerry supported the Prussian Investigation and their meddling in the 2016 Presidential Election and also the Prussian diplomats were expelled from the United States for their involvement. However, Johan Gruber, a Prussian diplomat became very angry at John Kerry and threatened to sue him if he didn't drop all the charges. Category:Leftists Category:False Gods Category:Traitors Category:Monarchs